Saturday, February 28, 2009

Quotes from an article on Highly Sensitive People by Dr. Aron

HSP's always have to work on their boundaries because we are so aware of other people's desires and needs and how they will suffer and therefore, we will suffer if they aren't satisfied. Women, in particular, are trained to please others.

We want to know someone well before we take the plunge, even though I also find we fall in love harder than others once we decide we love someone.

All HSP's can stumble into the mistake of trying to be perfect, because we can sense the consequences of mistakes.

Protect yourself from those who do not respect you. There is so much sexism on both sides, men towards women and women towards men, especially towards sensitive men or women. Sometimes, you can argue with people but there's a limit. So, I really advise people to surround themselves with those who have the good sense to disregard damaging stereotypes... The next point is to confront your ideas about Highly Sensitive men and homosexuality. I think that Sensitive women need to appreciate that they may be happiest with a Sensitive man and feel better as a woman. Sensitive men and women may confuse sensitivity with homosexuality for some reason.

Though I have only begun to study this, being sensitive seems to be a good thing instead of something to be ashamed of. Though I noticed depending on the company you keep, you will feel one way or another way about your ideas/dreams/feelings. You will either feel valid, or unintelligent (all of the time). This literature is triggering an understanding and tenderness in it's reader in the acceptance of one's sensitivity even through day to day life asks us to be continually harder and harder. Mistaking a callousness for strength, and an emptiness for boldness. I've noticed that many are afraid to connect with this inner gentleness, a vulnerability in them that easily connects to others on a genuine level, as well as talk about what their intuitions and feelings are. Most shy away from the concept of psychology and talking to someone about the ideas they have. Though, being in the field of psychology, I have learned that talking to a psychologist can sort of unclog the clogged drain of feelings, so to speak. It builds one's confidence in expressing themselves when they are taught to keep everything in. As if not explaining how we feel is strong or noble! It is the reverse that is noble and takes the most strength.


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